Mar 1, 2010

HOPE IS FRAGILE

After receiving a diagnosis of pancreatic cancer, Patrick Swayze appeared on a TV interview and made a comment I will never forget. Weary of the naysayers and negative forecasts regarding his prognosis he said, "Hope is a fragile thing." Those words reverberated in my mind for weeks. I got to thinking how mysterious hope is. What creates it? Where does it come from? Why do some people have it while others lose it altogether?

Swayze's comment was profound. Hope certainly is a delicate matter. When we are suffering, just one discouraging comment can utterly shatter our hope; likewise, just one encouraging word can fill us with the hope to face another day. In the midst of overwhelming circumstances, when our spirits are crushed, hope, if even a flicker, is the vehicle that carries us forward.

In the Bible, Romans chapter 4 says this:

"Against all hope, Abraham in hope believed and so became the father of many nations, just as it had been said to him, 'So shall your offspring be.' Without weakening in his faith, he faced the fact that his body was as good as dead—since he was about a hundred years old—and that Sarah's womb was also dead. Yet he did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised."

God had promised Abraham a child from his loins. Twenty-five long years passed before that promise was fulfilled—years, no doubt, filled with longing and frustration. Abraham was 100 years old when his wife, Sarah, finally gave birth to their son, Isaac. Despite over two decades of waiting for God to answer Abraham’s prayers, Abraham continued to hope against hope. He knew who His God was and what God had promised, and that belief sustained him.

The book of Job reveals something interesting about hope as well. This great Old Testament saint suffered the loss of 10 children, his livelihood, and his health all at the same time. At first he courageously declared, "Though he slay me, yet I will hope in him." (Job 13:15). But as days of torment turned into months without any signs of relief, Job asked the rhetorical question: "What strength do I have that I should still hope?" (Job 6:11). The pain had begun to wear on Job’s determination.

These were the examples that I clung to at the peak of my medical crisis. When I returned home from a week-long stay in the hospital, my hope for healing was paper thin. In the painful months of recuperation that followed, there were moments when I felt like I had lost hope altogether. Was I going to suffer like this for the rest of my life? Would there be no end? When to the naked eye our circumstances appear to be turning out for the worst, it's easy to embrace the lie that God is angry at us. The loss of hope can be a terrifying feeling that leads to deep despair.

I’ve learned that hope is a gift from God, and God is always faithful to His children. In our weakness we may lose sight of Him, but He never loses sight of us. When hope fails, we must ask the Giver of hope to fill us once again. For all good gifts come from the Father above.

Prayer: Lord, I admit my weakness…that I have lost my hope. But I believe that You are able to restore it. Just as you created the world out of nothing, You are able to create hope where there is emptiness within me. Please fill me with the strength and courage to know that You still love me, and that You have a purpose for this pain in my life. Amen.

2 comments:

TheszEyz said...

I was listening to the re-cast of the Patrick Swayze interview tonight with Barbara Walters. I was actually headed out of the bedroom, and I was stopped by Patrick's words, "hope is fragile". I came out to Google the statement, to see if I could find what he said after that statement. My heart remembers, but I am unable to put it in exact words. This is how I came upon your blog.

I have now spent the greater of over an hour here, reading, weeping, and in certain agreement with your heartfelt thoughts. Ironically, you posted this particular blog on the Saturday that we laid our Mother to rest. I, too, wrestle with some life-altering health issues. The culmination of that, coupled with Mom's death, the loss of my employment and relationship (all within 2 months), has left me feeling disconnected and spiraling out of control. I have learned that your pain doesn't mean anything to those who cannot feel it; and there be only a few who make you feel as though 'you matter'. I have avoided people, places, and anything that I used to do for the sake of hobby in lieu of sitting with the pain. I give it to God, and then I callously take it back. I pray, but I have to be honest enough to say that I am angry. I don't see where this road is leading, and it brings a fear that I've never known before. I am like the man with the ill child before Jesus, "I believe; help me to believe".

So much of my life is falling apart, yet the Lord, in His mercy, has not allowed me to see total demise. He has touched hearts in such a way that I could never imagine to come to my aid. My situation could be far worse when held against the issues of another; yet, my heart aches for relief in the form of God's great mercy.

I thank God, in that, as sorrowful as was the news of Patrick's death, his words led me to your site. I have helped myself to your words of encouragement, prayed with you in your prayers, and will hold on to my 'paper thin' portion of hope. Thank you for your loving kindness in creating this blog; you have been a candle on a cold, dark night. God bless your endeavors.

P.S. I will remind you, if you so choose to read any of my blog entries; I am angry, and have been for quite some time. Please pray for me.

Eileen said...

Dear Friend,

Thank you for sharing your struggles. I am so sorry about your mom.

My heart went out to you as I read your comments. So often I, too, struggle with a sense of disconnect and I wrestle with the circumstances of my life...that things aren't "normal" or even close to what I wish they were. It is a daily struggle...especially with emotion. One day I'm ok with God, the next I'm hurt, the next I'm angry...around and around I go. How I wish it would all even out!

But, like you, the overall picture shows me that God has not let me fall to the point of not getting back up, and this is what He promises in His word. This reminds of 2 Corinthians 4:8...."We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed."

As Christians, we are truly in in a war here on earth....and just like any war, its battle after battle until the war is over. The only sustenance I can find for my weariness is to go back to His word....even if I have to force myself to stop and read just a few passages....and I pray. I had a bad day a few days ago...just weary of medical, financial, and other losses. I sat and read Psalm 42 and 43 and they brought me to tears...I felt a reminder in my heart that God is indeed still watching over my life, and that He will bring it all to pass.

Meanwhile, God knows we feel, that we must cry, that we get frustrated, that we are dust.

I will pray for you, that He will strengthen your heart and sustain your will to keep your eyes on Him. Thank you once again for sharing and for your kind words.